Floundering

I started to title this post 'struggling' but then I admitted to myself that you can't really call it a 'struggle' if you aren't really trying.

It seems that my cravings have taken over, and I've let them. In each case, I really tried to be on the healthy side of naughty. For example, I wanted Mexican rice. So instead of eating the whole batch as a meal, I made it into a chicken, black bean, veggie, salsa mixture and turned it into 6 meals. No cheese, no sour cream, but still a big portion with a lot of starch. I also went to Taco Bell, but I ordered two tacos off the 'fresh' menu, or whatever their lower-cal menu is called.

And if I'm gonna be completely accountable, I made a batch of snickerdoodles last night, and had a box of Poptarts over a couple days last week - no 'healthy side of naughty' with these - just plain naughty. I don't even really like snickerdoodles! But I had the mix in my cupboards - I think I got them at 50% off holiday items at Target after Easter. BTW, sales are dangerous for the dieter - usually, it's the crap that goes on sale. You'll never see a mescalin mix discount!

I guess I've been eating like a 'normal' person not a dieting person. Maybe I can call this phase my mini-maintenance! Yeah! That's putting a positive spin on not working toward my goal...anyway, I haven't gained any weight, which honestly shocks the hell out of me. I fear the reason for this is that I might have gained fat but lost muscle.

So, I'm going to set mini-goals:
I vow to lose 5 pounds by September 30
I vow to lose an additional 12 pounds in October
I vow to lose an additional 10 pounds in November.

This will get me to a really magical place - 80 pounds lost. Puffy is going to fit super well by November!! Oh, I never shared a picture of Puffy! What the hell is wrong with me?

Also, I teased with Shawna that I was going to put my 'before' picture in the visor of my car as a deterrent for when my car starts steering toward Taco Bell, or the MACdonalds. But, joking aside, I really think I will. Nothing will scare me straight like the Blue Rhino photo.